2023 Week 2: oof ouch owie

 

I've never seen the original image for this, idk what Pooh is actually eating. Glue?

If this is your first time connecting to the internet since last Wednesday (I'm flattered thank you) you might be unaware that a lot of awesome people that are good at playing football are getting injured. It has not been a good time.

Through the first two weeks, we've lost the following players to season (possible career) ending injuries:

• Aaron Rodgers
• JK Dobbins
• Nick Chubb

At age 39 can Rodgers really recover from an achilles? Does he even want to play again after he came so close to retirement in his darkness retreat this summer? For guys like Dobbins and Chubb who were nearing the ends of their contracts will anyone pay them even if they can come back?

We also have a ton of star players with concussions, hamstring, groin, etc injuries that will sideline them for a bit including

• Jaylen Waddle
• Austin Ekeler
• Saquon Barkley
• Anthony Richardson
• Joe Burrow(?)

I know people get hurt a lot in football, but this time around just feels more extreme to me. And I haven't even brought myself to watch Chubb's knee get destroyed. I think those links may stay blue for me.

one of those shows I know exists but couldn't tell you anything about

Matchups

TJ Hock’s Pro Skater 133.30 vs Ja'Mario Kart 109.45

What a bittersweet week for Pro Skater. He gets a convincing 20+ point win largely thanks to TJ Hockenson's 2TD performance on Thursday but loses both Saquon and Richardson in the process. He may not have to wait tooo long for either of these guys to come back but with Kamara still suspended and Christian Watson also injured that's a lot of 0s on your bench for week 3.

For Ja'Mario Kart, the Deandre Swift performance is incredibly hopeful for his future, but two main questions have surfaced: can Ja'Marr Chase be a top 3 WR with a hobbled Joe Burrow, and can Deshaun Watson remember how to play QB? I'm a lot more confident in Chase out of those two, but both let him down in a big way in week 2.

Diggs Dug 96.60 vs B ROB1NSZN^2 149.95

My word. The Brian Robinson breakout is real, and this team looks unstoppable. ROB1NSZN leads all teams by 80+ points through 2 weeks and nothing in the week 2 stat sheet really looks like a fluke to me. Tyreek? Robinson(and Robinson)? Keenan? Lamar Jackson? Yeah, these scores are repeatable. For now this is the team to beat.

Diggs Dug, I'm sorry but there was no chance this week. With 4 very disappointing RBs in Pierce, Dillon, Dalvin Cook, and Jamaal Williams you've got to hope that one of them can break through and hold that position on your roster but things are.. not good right now.

Praise the Sun 78.30 vs Allen Wake 116.60

Things are looking grim for Praise the Sun 2 weeks into the season. Between Trevor Lawrence being unable to notch a touchdown in 4 trips to the red zone, Josh Kelley's crash back to reality after his week 1 explosion, and the Giants somehow barely beating an Arizona squad that's actively trying to lose, it was a rough week.

The one real bright spot on this team is Puka Nacua, maybe he can make his way off the bench for week 3?

Allen Wake gets an easy 30 point win this week despite none of his players really doing anything outstanding. Josh Allen and Justin Jefferson did their usual stuff and that was enough.

Lockett League 108.05 vs DK King of Swing 92.15

The rocket league gifs.... are working! For seemingly the 27th season in a row Tyler Lockett proves his doubters wrong, posting 2 TDs on 8 catches to boost this squad to a win. He's gone from "guy that catches long bombs across from Doug Baldwin and can't keep this pace up" to "WR2 behind DK Metcalf who somehow outscores him" to "old WR that's getting replaced by JSN" and just keeps scoring fantasy points. 

For the King of Swing, there are some real warning signs here. I feel incredibly confident in the AJ Brown bounce back, but I can't say the same for Kyle Pitts (bad passing offense) or Najee Harris (bad football playing). More blowup weeks like this from Gabe David would at least help a bit.

Bass Hunter 64 129.95 vs Pollard's Gate III 110.30

Wow, what a week for Bass Hunter. A 19 point win is always welcome, but he could have had a lot more. Bench players Raheem Mostert, Nico Collins, and Kyren Williams all topped 25 points in week 2. That's going to make for a lot of tricky decisions in week 4, but not a bad problem to have!

The other story for Bass Hunter is that Mike Evans is vindicating all the people who believed in him despite being paired up with Baker Mayfield for the season. I don't think Baker is an amazing QB but he loves taking deep shots and Evans is ready for all of them. He's the WR3 behind just Tyreek and Justin Jefferson through 2 weeks.

It wasn't a terrible week for Pollard's Gate, but playing the Jets Defense against the Cowboys while starting both Pollard and CD Lamb is a bit of a head scratcher. There was really no way you were going to be happy with all 3 of those options. Pollard needs both the Bengals and Jags offenses to work out their issues to unlock the real potential of this squad.

Kuppheads 114.75 vs momo 113.45

Wow, I actually won this? I failed two weeks in a row on the start/sit decision regarding Drake London and it should have cost me the week. Zach Moss really surprised to keep me in the game and Chubb's injury sealed things.

momo got a great bounce back from Higgins after his 0 in week one, but it ultimately wasn't quite enough. In a much more surprising turn of events, benching the 49ers defense would have actually been the right play here, but more on that below.

Pickup of the Week

Man, what a tough call this week. 2 LA Rams players commanded big FAAB bids after our week 1 waivers and both performed again in week 2.

I think I'll give Kyren Williams (Bass Hunter 64) a slight edge here because the position is in such dire need across the league today, but Puka Nacua is the real deal.

Shameful Benching of the Week

momo has the blessing and curse of having 2 amazing fantasy defenses on their roster, which means picking between them can be difficult. The 21 point difference between the Steelers and the 49ers DST this week would have turned his 1 point loss into a comfortable victory, and I actually think this was something we could have seen without hindsight. The Rams are a better offense than people expected them to be this season and the Browns are a dumpster fire.